August 11, 2014

How to Catch a Live Rattlesnake

Hire someone to do it.

The End.

It was a beautiful day for hanging laundry, and so I was.  My nine year old comes outside and hands me the phone. It was my neighbors whom we had hired to cut our alfalfa field. They'd only been down there a short while, so I was hoping everything was ok. Everything was fine, they'd just come across a rattlesnake... and wanted to catch it. No big deal, they just needed a bucket with a lid, and a shovel to assist them. I looked around for a five gallon bucket with a lid. Plenty of buckets, no lids. I had to resort to an ice cream bucket, which is pretty small for a nine rattler snake if you ask me! I grabbed the shovel and almost grabbed my .22 because I'd rather just see it dead myself, but who am I? A MOM WITH SMALL CHILDREN THAT RUN AROUND BARE FOOT THAT'S WHO! But, I didn't want to spoil their fun, so I left it home, secretly hoping they'd just kill it with the shovel.

They were in the far side of the field near some trees and tall grass. I was careful to part the grass and watch where I was walking as I neared them. They were watching it under a tree. I handed the son the bucket and shovel. He already has one stuffed snake in his house so I asked him if one wasn't enough for a house. He said he knows someone that does taxidermy and he wanted to give it to him. OOOhhh kay, catch the snake. He reached out with the shovel to scoop it up. It started slithering away, naturally. I nearly jumped out of my socks and found myself  behind the father, who was a fair distance away.  I squirmed and kept telling him how crazy he was as he finally got the snake in the bucket and covered with the shovel. Now for the lid. How exactly do you remove the shovel from an ice cream container that is only six inches deep containing a big rattlesnake, and replace it with a flimsy little plastic lid and still be alive in a few hours? Very carefully, and quickly at that. I could see he had experience doing this and felt better once the lid was on.
I told him it was going to stink by the time he finished cutting the field. His dad said it may get out. So he asked me if I wanted to take it home and keep it in my freezer until they finished. Hmmm.... summertime, popsicles, small children... NO. Plus then I'd have to carry that thing, are you kidding me? No, no, no way. His dad asked if he had any tape in his tractor. Negative. I said, " I'll give you a ride home and you can put it in YOUR freezer." That was what we decided to do. However he had to sit in the back seat holding tightly to the container and lid. Just as we were leaving his dad gave me some advice. "If it get's out, just jump out and leave him in the back seat with it!" Yes, that sounded like a good plan.

We drove down the lane to his house listening to a rattle every now and again. He got out and put the snake in his freezer. I mentioned to him to make sure he told his wife he didn't bring home ice cream. We laughed. He comes to get back in the vehicle and says, "Do you still want me to sit in the back?" I thought a second and said "Nah, I guess you can sit in the front." We laughed again. That's how you catch a live rattlesnake. Let your neighbor do it.

Here is his snake they caught a while back. It's taxadermied I guess you would call it. That's not a word, whatever. 

 Here's the one we, HE caught today. You can see it is in deep hibernation slumber land. Even after 6 hours in the freezer he would still be alive once he warmed up. 
P.S. I did not take these pictures. I sent my husband to do it. Look at all those rattles. That's a kid killer right there. That's why he dies.

No comments:

Post a Comment

01 09 10